Welcome to the Spot Writers. This month’s prompt is “winter is coming.”
This week’s contribution comes from Chiara De Giorgi. Chiara is an Italian author and currently lives in Berlin, Germany. She writes fiction, with a focus on children’s literature and science fiction.
Ho-Ho-Howling and Other Stories
by Chiara De Giorgi
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Elsa Mon, the beloved paranormal romance writer, was freezing.
The heater had broken two days earlier, and she had added layers to her clothing as the temperature in the house dropped. She sat at her desk wearing four sweaters, wool tights under thick pants, two pairs of gloves, a scarf, and a beanie, disconsolately holding a hot cup of tea.
Something like this would never happen to the heroines of my novels, she thought as she sniffled.
An idea suddenly sneaked into her mind. What if, for a change, she put her characters in a truly challenging situation?
Immediately, she began to consider some options. She needed to write something new for Christmas anyway, and she had already decided that it would be a spin-off of one of her already published novels, but she had not yet chosen one.
After much leafing through pages, making notes on every paper surface at hand, underlining, highlighting, erasing, and so on, Elsa Mon was no longer so cold. In fact, she was quite sweaty and was able to shed a couple of layers of clothes. But more importantly, she had made a decision about her story.
She was going to write a cross-over between Laura—the human protagonist of Distance Dating with the Other Side in a relationship with Charles, a distinguished ghost and former Victorian-era marquis she had met on a paranormal dating app, SpectralMatch—and the werewolves featured in her bestseller Wuthering Howls—whom she had named Catherine and Heathcliff, just to ensure no one missed the reference. And she would add an unexpected twist at the end.
‘Oh, yes. This is very promising,’ she told herself.
Now she needed a suitable setting and a problem to solve. And it had to be a serious problem—not the usual trivia she typically came up with, aware that her readers were more interested in the steam and romance than in the problem-solving skills of her protagonists.
By evening, despite the heater still being broken and the scent of snow in the air outside (winter was coming, after all), Elsa was sitting in a tank top and shorts on the rug in front of the fireplace, surrounded by stacks of papers, with empty cups of tea (and empty glasses of mulled wine) serving as paperweights.
“Three stories,” she said finally, looking with sparkling eyes at the pages on which she had jotted her favorite ideas. “One for Laura and one for Catherine. Both stories will end with a cliffhanger and merge in the last one, where the two ladies will join forces to solve their respective problems. And then... the surprise ending. I will publish them as a collection, I already have the perfect title in mind!” She chuckled. “My editor will love it!”
Story one: Fangs Under the Mistletoe
The letter from the Vampiric Council of Holiday Affairs took Laura by surprise.
Dear Miss Laura,
The latest update to our system, thanks to data collected by SpectralMatch, shows that you are undead. Please send us the appropriate certification of undeath by the Winter Solstice Ball, where you will be officially welcomed into the ranks of the noble Vampires.
Cordially, etc.
Laura spent the night on the phone alternately with the customer service at SpectralMatch—who must have swapped her information with someone else’s—and the Council, as the operators bounced her from one office to another, until she managed to speak to the Undead Registry Chief Officer.
“Get us proof of your mortality by the Winter Solstice Ball,” he told her, “and we'll remove your name from our registry lists.”
It sounded simple, but getting the required paperwork was complicated by the computer systems of the living and that of the undead being incompatible, as well as by the impending mid-winter holidays. Moreover, Charles, who was quite fond of the idea of dating an undead, sabotaged any attempt by Laura to prove her identity. This led to a speedy end to their relationship.
But the Winter Solstice approached, and Laura was still officially undead.
Story two: Jingle Hell
Catherine was shocked when she realized the reason why no one in her pack could howl anymore.
Since the last full moon, only the top-rated pop songs of the year had been coming out of their throats. A kind of wild, involuntary karaoke that definitely undermined their reputation as werewolves. And their self-respect and self-esteem received a severe blow whenever, instead of a heartfelt howl, which should have sent shivers down the spines of humans and other creatures, out of their mouths came a boisterous, “I can buy myself floweeeeeers!”
Their annual howliday would be a disaster!
“A curse?” she asked in disbelief. “And why would a demon curse my pack?”
“The demon Sally loves parties,” the old witch replied, “and she is also quite erratic and unpredictable. Last year she had a fling with Heathcliff, but then he left her to come to you.”
“Sally? What kind of name is that for a demon?” Catherine was increasingly incredulous. “And didn't anyone tell her that I chose to be pack leader rather than be with Heathcliff? And besides, what is it about her loving parties? Ugh, I don’t get it!”
“It has everything to do with it! Because, you see, she loves parties more than she loves Heathcliff. She was counting on partying at your wedding, but you dumped poor Heathcliff and Sally was disappointed. Now she has kidnapped him and wants to crash the Winter Solstice Ball and get married in front of everyone. Only then will her spirit be appeased, and the curse of Myley Cyrus broken.”
Catherine took a minute to digest all the information the old witch had just given her.
“Old witch,” she finally said. “We must save Heathcliff. I may have broken up with him, but I can’t see him married to a demon.”
Story three: Ho-Ho-Howling
It was mid-winter night, the evening of the Grand Ball.
Laura, dressed in an elegant blue velvet gown and with a glittering tiara, made her entrance into the castle hall aware that it might be her last night as a living human being. She had one last card to play. She knew that the Undead Registry Chief Officer would be present and immediately set about finding him.
Catherine arrived when the dance had already started, dressed in combat gear and carrying a flask full of holy water in her back pocket. She wasn’t sure it would help, but she hadn’t had time to find out how to neutralize a demon.
Midnight was near when Laura finally spotted the Undead Registry Chief Officer and hurried towards him, clutching the pocket mirror in her hand with which she would prove to him that she was indeed alive and well. She was only a few steps away when, with a loud roar, the demon Sally appeared in the middle of the hall. Noisy and exuberant, in a lavish wedding dress, she was dragging a reluctant Heathcliff and singing “All I want for Christmas is youuuuu” at the top of her voice.
After that, everything happened quickly.
As the castle clock struck midnight, Catherine splashed holy water over Sally. The only outcome was that she made the demon, who had spent three hours at the hairdresser’s, furious. Her hairstyle was ruined, and her desire to marry Heathcliff was instantly surpassed by that of incinerating Catherine. A moment before she could put her intention into action, Laura leapt in front of her, showing the demon her mirror. The incendiary rays coming out of Sally’s eyes bounced back and set fire to her wedding dress. Embarrassed, the demon vanished in a cloud of black smoke. At the same moment, Catherine felt a knot melt in her throat and knew that the curse had been broken. She immediately let out a howl that made the skin of everyone present crawl, but then she smiled sweetly, and the ball resumed.
“What can I do to repay you for your brave gesture?” she asked Laura.
Laura smiled sadly, knowing midnight had passed and her chance to prove her humanity was gone. The Undead Registry Chief Officer had spotted her and was already approaching.
“Nothing... Thank you, but my time among the living is running out.”
Catherine had her explain everything, then said, “Let me take care of it.”
She intercepted the bureaucrat and put her arm around his shoulders, after which she showed him her sharp, glistening fangs and exchanged a few words with him, which Laura could not hear. But soon after, the Undead Registry Chief Officer coughed awkwardly.
“Miss Laura," he said, "your friend here tells me that you are carrying proof that you are not undead. I have decided to grant you an extension and I will accept the proof even if we are past the stated deadline.”
A smile broke out on Laura’s face. She took the pocket mirror and held it in front of her face, showing her own reflection to the vampire. He nodded briefly and gave a slight bow.
“Happy Midwinter’s Night,” he said, and turned away.
Afterwards, Catherine held out her hand to Laura and she took it, and the two danced together all night long.
And they lived happily ever after.
The Spot Writers:
Val Muller: http://www.valmuller.com/blog/
Catherine A. MacKenzie: https://writingwicket.wordpress.com/wicker-chitter/
Phil Yeats: https://alankemisterauthor.wordpress.com/
Chiara De Giorgi: https://chiaradegiorgi.blogspot.com/
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